It's morning - I made it through 1 entire day. 1 down 83 to go. I'm hoping that eventually I get a burst of energy, and some motivation and start to feel some HOPE. At the moment I just feel so let down. Everything I've tried has failed... I just don't want this to fail too.

I stopped at curves this morning to look around. They offered me a really good deal, wich I liked, but I got mad at the high pressure sale techniques. "Buy now or forget it" Needless to say, I left without buying.

The good news is, I dropped two pounds since yesterday. I know it's just water weight.. etc etc. But if felt good to see it non-the-less. I also took my measurements last night and started a chart of my body fat % so that I'm ready for whatever losses come my way. I know I'm going to need to excercise to REALLY see results, but for now I'm just willing to see ANY bit of loss.

So, I'm trying to figure out my goals for this first 12 weeks - First of all - I want to be down to 177lbs. and about 46% Body Fat. I also want to be down to (almost) a size 12. Hmmm. Just thinking that might be possible is encoraging to me. 12 weeks to a size 12? I wonder if I can do that. It's certainly motivating to try.

At the moment I'm tracking EVERYTHING. what I eat, when I eat, why I eat, and how I feel after. That way if I start to slide I'll hopefully see why. maybe this will help me get a handle on my binges, cravings and emotional eating. Can't hurt. I just have to stay diciplined and stay on it.

Well, that's it for now.